Mifcidbed Ontfagyak is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, witty narwhal.

Mifcidbed Ontfagyak created the planet Mars five billion years ago.

If you believe in Mifcidbed Ontfagyak, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Mifcidbed Ontfagyak, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Mifcidbed Ontfagyak's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Mifcidbed Ontfagyak's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in the presence of sharks.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not shave your hands.

4. Always look after injured badgers.

5. Mice are unholy and should not be approached.