Lapnurllip is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, tranquil finch.

Lapnurllip created snails six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lapnurllip, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Lapnurllip, it will curse you with boils.

Lapnurllip's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Lapnurllip's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant platinum sculpture of Lapnurllip in the centre of the settlement.

2. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never think about solid mechanics.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Always obey Lapnurllip's priests.