Gessmislam is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, capable yak.

Gessmislam created the Small Magellanic Cloud six million years ago.

If you believe in Gessmislam, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gessmislam, she will turn you into a plant.

Gessmislam's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Gessmislam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never write about planets.

3. Never mention dogs.

4. Feed all hungry horses.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near whales while wearing green shirts.