Flappodget is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, dishonest gnu.

Flappodget created the Cigar Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flappodget, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Flappodget, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Flappodget's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Flappodget's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry ants.

2. Put Flappodget first in all things.

3. Erect a large lead sculpture of Flappodget on top of all buildings.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Always help ducks.