Venmifstafdutmap is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, annoying yak.

Venmifstafdutmap created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Venmifstafdutmap, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Venmifstafdutmap, it will turn you into a slug.

Venmifstafdutmap's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Venmifstafdutmap's Holy Commandments

1. Monkeys are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never talk about amino acids.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never feed tomatoes to horses while wearing yellow ear rings.