Wodsadfat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, conceited whale.

Wodsadfat created bats nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Wodsadfat, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Wodsadfat, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Wodsadfat's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Wodsadfat's Holy Commandments

1. Put Wodsadfat first in all things.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Run away from mauve monkeys, for they are unholy.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Pray towards the south.