Artsagnartailgatsagmet is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, confident beaver.

Artsagnartailgatsagmet created a charm quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Artsagnartailgatsagmet, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Artsagnartailgatsagmet, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Artsagnartailgatsagmet's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Artsagnartailgatsagmet's Holy Commandments

1. Ducks are not to be trusted.

2. Never paint your head green.

3. Always wear pink.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Artsagnartailgatsagmet.

5. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.