Bongumstaf Jadsis is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, merciful human.

Bongumstaf Jadsis created the planet Earth five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bongumstaf Jadsis, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bongumstaf Jadsis, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bongumstaf Jadsis' most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Bongumstaf Jadsis' Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not keep six geese in a large pit.

4. Never sprint in holy places.

5. Hide from pink badgers for they are unholy.