Hubkoncin is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, self-confident snail.

Hubkoncin created the planet Mars seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Hubkoncin, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Hubkoncin, it will turn you into a rock.

Hubkoncin's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Hubkoncin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat cucumbers.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not hurt nematodes.