Cabyamyarl is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, selfish narwhal.

Cabyamyarl created an atom seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabyamyarl, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Cabyamyarl, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Cabyamyarl's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Cabyamyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Cabyamyarl.

2. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in pink.

3. Never feed strawberries to pigs while wearing black ear rings.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never write about cell theory.