Yartdavgubbadyarveenquim is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, humorless cat.

Yartdavgubbadyarveenquim created a bottom quark two years ago.

If you believe in Yartdavgubbadyarveenquim, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Yartdavgubbadyarveenquim, he will think nothing of it.

Yartdavgubbadyarveenquim's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Yartdavgubbadyarveenquim's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed parsnips to whales while wearing ear rings.

2. Never feed spinach to mice while wearing yellow coats.

3. Never talk about quantum mechanics.

4. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not make images of living things.