Cemdisstenwanlarndungut is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, prudent goblin.

Cemdisstenwanlarndungut created an electron six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cemdisstenwanlarndungut, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cemdisstenwanlarndungut, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Cemdisstenwanlarndungut's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Cemdisstenwanlarndungut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

2. Never think about thermodynamics near nematodes while wearing green shirts and balancing three tin spheres on your chest.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Cemdisstenwanlarndungut on top of all buildings.

5. Fast once a month.