Tenkamtafraksabmon is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, unsympathetic parrot.

Tenkamtafraksabmon created the Sun eight million years ago.

If you believe in Tenkamtafraksabmon, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Tenkamtafraksabmon, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Tenkamtafraksabmon's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Tenkamtafraksabmon's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. You must never eat nuts.

4. Feed all hungry mites.

5. Always make sure there are no swans in a room before entering it.