Langigfatguplarglipdutrul is a god.

He takes the form of a large, self-assured snake.

Langigfatguplarglipdutrul created bats two million years ago.

If you believe in Langigfatguplarglipdutrul, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Langigfatguplarglipdutrul, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Langigfatguplarglipdutrul's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Langigfatguplarglipdutrul's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Erect a giant white sculpture of Langigfatguplarglipdutrul in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never talk about special relativity.

4. Never think ill of sick horses.

5. Do not stand on grass.