Parkzimfed is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, strong yak.

Parkzimfed created matter five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Parkzimfed, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Parkzimfed, it will not care.

Parkzimfed's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Parkzimfed's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near grasshopers while wearing red rings and balancing nine zinc spheres on your feet.

3. Feed all hungry frogs.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Erect a giant black sculpture of Parkzimfed in the centre of the settlement.