Zancardubjam is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, cheerful jaguar.

Zancardubjam created a bottom quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zancardubjam, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Zancardubjam, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Zancardubjam's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Zancardubjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep five turtles in a large pit.

2. Do not hurt mites.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Always help ants in need.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.