Quillxinfit is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, self-assured cat.

Quillxinfit created dark matter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Quillxinfit, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Quillxinfit, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Quillxinfit's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Quillxinfit's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Quillxinfit loves great tits, so they must be respected.

3. Never sprint in the presence of whales.

4. You must pray to Quillxinfit seven times a day.

5. Never write about quantum field theory.