Jonbif is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, passionate dingo.

Jonbif created Africa five billion years ago.

If you believe in Jonbif, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Jonbif, it will turn you into a rat.

Jonbif's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Jonbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about ultrasonics near eagles while wearing fawn skirts and balancing three nickel spheres on your back.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never talk about spacetime near doves while wearing black kilts.

5. Never write about gravity.