Cenligleg is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, stupid swan.

Cenligleg created snails five million years ago.

If you believe in Cenligleg, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Cenligleg, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Cenligleg's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Cenligleg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep nine bats in a large pit.

2. Always help sick great tits.

3. Always help horses.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never wear violet shirts.