Loglarnstan is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, loving scorpion.

Loglarnstan created an up quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Loglarnstan, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Loglarnstan, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Loglarnstan's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Loglarnstan's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Loglarnstan on top of all buildings.

2. Always help cats in need.

3. Never bounce near manatees.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

5. Always wear pink.