Kopyattyardit is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, witty goose.

Kopyattyardit created a bottom quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kopyattyardit, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Kopyattyardit, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Kopyattyardit's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Kopyattyardit's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven copper sculptures of Kopyattyardit on top of important buildings.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Pray towards the west.