Davjonfad Bigflamfod is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, all-powerful yak.

Davjonfad Bigflamfod created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Davjonfad Bigflamfod, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Davjonfad Bigflamfod, she will think nothing of it.

Davjonfad Bigflamfod's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Davjonfad Bigflamfod's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Put Davjonfad Bigflamfod first in all things.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate squirrels.

5. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Davjonfad Bigflamfod in the centre of the settlement.