Ligkikpig is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, dishonourable deer.

Ligkikpig created dark matter eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ligkikpig, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Ligkikpig, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Ligkikpig's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Ligkikpig's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if six badgers approach from the east.

2. Ligkikpig loves hamsters, so they must be honoured.

3. Always look after injured geese.

4. Worship no other gods but Ligkikpig.

5. Erect a large gold sculpture of Ligkikpig on top of all buildings.