Kapbudmon is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, dishonest dove.

Kapbudmon created time and space eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kapbudmon, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Kapbudmon, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Kapbudmon's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Kapbudmon's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Kapbudmon's priests.

2. Never feed cucumbers to nematodes while wearing shoes.

3. Do not kill sheep.

4. Never chant near sharks.

5. Never paint your neck orange.