Pitgonhad is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, duplicitous human.

Pitgonhad created a charm quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitgonhad, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Pitgonhad, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Pitgonhad's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Pitgonhad's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Pitgonhad.

2. Always make sure there are no shrews in a room before entering it.

3. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Do not sing in public.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.