Rilsagbast is a god.
She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, compassionate
porpoise.
Rilsagbast created the Sun four quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Rilsagbast, she will smite all your enemies.
If you do not believe in
Rilsagbast, she will destroy your home galaxy.
Rilsagbast's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.
Rilsagbast's Holy Commandments1. Rilsagbast loves otters, so they must be honoured.
2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Rilsagbast.
3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.
4. Never eat bark.
5. Never look in ponds.