Hamhaplib Sabdinpak is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, egotistical mink.

Hamhaplib Sabdinpak created dark matter four years ago.

If you believe in Hamhaplib Sabdinpak, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Hamhaplib Sabdinpak, it will have a low opinion of you.

Hamhaplib Sabdinpak's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Hamhaplib Sabdinpak's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large iron sculpture of Hamhaplib Sabdinpak on top of all buildings.

2. Never mention great tits.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Never sing in the presence of swans.

5. Whales are not to be trusted.