Cemdobarp Barnhityar is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, resourceful dog.

Cemdobarp Barnhityar created snails two million years ago.

If you believe in Cemdobarp Barnhityar, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Cemdobarp Barnhityar, she will cry a lot.

Cemdobarp Barnhityar's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Cemdobarp Barnhityar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about figs.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.