Xuckgofnarl is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, blissful rat.

Xuckgofnarl created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xuckgofnarl, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Xuckgofnarl, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Xuckgofnarl's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Xuckgofnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Learn four new languages a year.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force near monkeys while wearing red dresses and balancing five silver spheres on your arms.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate tapirs.

4. Run away if eight pigs approach from the south.

5. Hide if seven birds approach from the north.