Cedwottof is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, tranquil hydra.

Cedwottof created the Small Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cedwottof, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cedwottof, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Cedwottof's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Cedwottof's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never talk about special relativity near whales while wearing green scarves.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always wear purple.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.