Kikxinladtetti is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, emotional coyote.

Kikxinladtetti created the Cigar Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kikxinladtetti, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Kikxinladtetti, he will refuse to believe in you.

Kikxinladtetti's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Kikxinladtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear purple.

2. Always help sick sharks.

3. Never write about optics.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.