Hattipbogfarkipquafhak is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, stupid gerbil.

Hattipbogfarkipquafhak created the planet Venus seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Hattipbogfarkipquafhak, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Hattipbogfarkipquafhak, she will jump up and down on your head.

Hattipbogfarkipquafhak's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Hattipbogfarkipquafhak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Feed all hungry nematodes.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.