Zimmetnat is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, able goat.

Zimmetnat created humankind three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimmetnat, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Zimmetnat, he will turn you into a tree.

Zimmetnat's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Zimmetnat's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear coats.

2. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Zimmetnat.

5. Do not wear yellow clothing.