Nakgangunmutflowbosspad Jarncambam is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, confident fox.

Nakgangunmutflowbosspad Jarncambam created Africa seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nakgangunmutflowbosspad Jarncambam, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Nakgangunmutflowbosspad Jarncambam, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Nakgangunmutflowbosspad Jarncambam's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Nakgangunmutflowbosspad Jarncambam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Never think about gravity.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Always obey Nakgangunmutflowbosspad Jarncambam's priests.

5. Never look in ponds.