Hatrilmit is a god.

He takes the form of a large, unsympathetic rat.

Hatrilmit created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hatrilmit, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hatrilmit, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Hatrilmit's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Hatrilmit's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if five snails approach from the east.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hatrilmit.

3. Never feed lemons to eagles while wearing cyan shorts.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

5. Do not speak about melons.