Gebganciss is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, unthoughtful hydra.

Gebganciss created Africa five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gebganciss, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gebganciss, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Gebganciss' most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Gebganciss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Hide if four bats approach from the east.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Pray towards the north.