Cenkemtonk Migbepzangud is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, capable duck.

Cenkemtonk Migbepzangud created the Sun seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Cenkemtonk Migbepzangud, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cenkemtonk Migbepzangud, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Cenkemtonk Migbepzangud's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Cenkemtonk Migbepzangud's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Learn seven new languages a year.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.