Gebjamarm is a god.

It takes the form of a small, merciless salamander.

Gebjamarm created the planet Jupiter six million years ago.

If you believe in Gebjamarm, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gebjamarm, it will turn you into a rat.

Gebjamarm's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Gebjamarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick badgers.

2. Retreat if seven turtles approach from the west.

3. Do not wear tin on your body.

4. Never talk about quantum field theory near dolphins while wearing white tights.

5. Never feed carrots to seals while wearing shirts.