Larnflatbagvonk is a god.

He takes the form of a small, confident rat.

Larnflatbagvonk created a Higgs boson two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Larnflatbagvonk, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Larnflatbagvonk, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Larnflatbagvonk's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Larnflatbagvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Larnflatbagvonk's priests.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. You must love Larnflatbagvonk.

4. Never eat onions.

5. Never eat bark.