Parklagtim is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, emotional bee.

Parklagtim created the Tadpole Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Parklagtim, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Parklagtim, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Parklagtim's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Parklagtim's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Parklagtim.

2. Learn nine new languages a year.

3. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

5. Always help sick grasshopers.