Flamguntimleg is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, overgenerous ant.

Flamguntimleg created dark energy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flamguntimleg, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Flamguntimleg, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Flamguntimleg's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Flamguntimleg's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Erect a giant cyan sculpture of Flamguntimleg in the centre of the settlement.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always help grasshopers.