Bitnellnilster is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, unfair dryad.

Bitnellnilster created oxygen five million years ago.

If you believe in Bitnellnilster, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bitnellnilster, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Bitnellnilster's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Bitnellnilster's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick snakes.

2. Always look after injured nematodes.

3. Always make sure there are no turtles in a room before entering it.

4. Always obey Bitnellnilster's priests.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.