Jonsadgam is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, flying bird.

Jonsadgam created a quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jonsadgam, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Jonsadgam, she will turn you into a worm.

Jonsadgam's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Jonsadgam's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate sheep.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never talk about deoxyribonucleic acid.

5. Feed all hungry manatees.