Luntargyiktanmumben is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, contented centipede.

Luntargyiktanmumben created a top quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Luntargyiktanmumben, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Luntargyiktanmumben, it will turn you into a goat.

Luntargyiktanmumben's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Luntargyiktanmumben's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Feed all hungry porpoises.

3. Luntargyiktanmumben must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate foxes.

5. Never feed rice to turtles while wearing ear rings.