Sterquafmitkimnigwig is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, competent snake.

Sterquafmitkimnigwig created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sterquafmitkimnigwig, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Sterquafmitkimnigwig, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Sterquafmitkimnigwig's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Sterquafmitkimnigwig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear white clothing.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sterquafmitkimnigwig.

3. Always look after injured hamsters.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate manatees.

5. Never think ill of sick turtles.