Minkenstaf is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, resourceful crocodile.

Minkenstaf created a top quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Minkenstaf, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Minkenstaf, she will remove you from existence.

Minkenstaf's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Minkenstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never talk about dogs.

3. Never hurt horses.

4. Never sing in the presence of doves.

5. Do not dye your hair indigo.