Cumcadstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, annoying coyote.

Cumcadstaf created the planet Jupiter seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumcadstaf, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Cumcadstaf, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Cumcadstaf's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Cumcadstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your neck.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. You must never eat figs.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never play with disobedient children.