Gebnurlkar is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, fast giraffe.

Gebnurlkar created the Milkyway two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gebnurlkar, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gebnurlkar, he will not invite you to parties.

Gebnurlkar's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Gebnurlkar's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed spinach to mites while wearing red tights.

2. Do not take Gebnurlkar's name in vain.

3. Never think about spacetime near shrews while wearing yellow coats and balancing five iron spheres on your legs.

4. You must love Gebnurlkar.

5. Feed all hungry grasshopers.