Quilljopnull is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, humane gorilla.

Quilljopnull created parasitic wasps three billion years ago.

If you believe in Quilljopnull, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Quilljopnull, he will try to impress you with trees.

Quilljopnull's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Quilljopnull's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about optics.

2. Never mention porpoises.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always make sure there are no cats in a room before entering it.