Ditripnurt is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, emotional cow.

Ditripnurt created the Sunflower Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ditripnurt, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Ditripnurt, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Ditripnurt's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Ditripnurt's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Ditripnurt.

2. Hide from violet tortoises for they are unholy.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always help gulls.

5. Never feed oranges to otters while wearing yellow scarves.